Learning things naturally

Some of the things I “understood” about the world when I was little:

·      The Bible was written by God

·      Heaven is reserved for perfect people, or people who die immediately after exiting the confessional

·      Whenever you said Jesus, you had to dip your head. . . or you would go to Hell.

·      There was an unusually high number of seagulls who had only one leg

·      Bringing volumes of Japanese Beetles and Gypsy moths into the house for scientific research made Mom especially angry

·      One can never catch up with weeding a garden enriched by cow manure

·      The best food in the world came from that garden

·      Some families served green beans from a can

·      Nana May and Papa Joe were real people; Nana Morrissey and Gamma were stern or unhappy, or both.

·      Having read “Odyssey of an Otter” is not in the same league as reading “The Odyssey”.  (Sorry, Mrs. Panza, for the misunderstanding in 3^rd grade.)

·      Being quiet and compliant in a classroom did not guarantee that the teacher would let you clap the chalk erasers.

·      In the absence of a road map, dead reckoning is a great substitute, and it doesn’t necessarily result in someone’s death.*

·      Lincoln Logs don’t stand a chance in a house where a dog lives.

 

*I had a paralyzing fear of becoming lost when I was little; I still become overly anxious if I don’t know where I am.  Whenever Mom and I were away from the house, if I sensed that she was lost I would begin to cry and beg her to tell me that she knew where she was going.  On one occasion, I demanded proof; she simply said, “dead reckoning, honey,” which to me meant somehow someone was going to die.  She appeared calm, and for the rest of the journey maintained an inscrutable smile.  I was worried.